I just can’t imagine my life without all the crazy, witty, and wild female friends that I have. Honestly, I think I love them all more than any of the men that I have dated. It would be an apocalypse for me if I found out that even one of them disliked me.
The original poster (OP) is going through something similar after one friend’s behavior rattled the whole group. Of course, she’s hurt by the one who wronged her, but she also wonders about the rest. Here’s what happened…
More info: Mumsnet
RELATED:Being friends with someone for over a decade and realizing they dislike you is probably the most hurtful betrayal
The poster has had a friend group of 4 since university, and they have been going strong for over a decade
Recently, she noticed that all of them went out together twice, but she didn’t receive any invitation either time
One friend (Meghan) told her that she declined Hannah’s lunch invitation, so she wasn’t asked again, but the poster has no clue about this
When she invited everyone for coffee, only Heather showed up and told her that Hannah dislikes her and even makes fun of her behind her back
She is devastated about this, but what hurts more is that even though Meghan and Heather didn’t back Hannah, they didn’t stand up for her either
She feels absolutely betrayed, but still wonders whether she’s being unreasonable to be mad at Heather and Meghan as well
When you have the right female friends, your whole life can revolve around them because they bring so much joy. The clueless poster also feels the same way, as her 10-year university friend group of 4 means a lot to her. Little does she know what is actually going on behind her back. The twist of the story unraveled, all because of Instagram posts made by one friend (Hannah).
OP saw Hannah post pictures of the whole group with their toddlers twice, and both times, she was not invited. Surprised by this, she texted one of them (Meghan) to see what was up. Well, Meghan revealed that since the poster declined Hannah’s lunch invitation, they didn’t think of inviting her a second time. What a shock for the poster, right?
She had never been invited, and she told Meghan so, but received no response. Trying to look past it, OP invited everyone for coffee, but only got a response from Heather. When they met, it was as if Pandora’s box opened, as OP heard some really shocking revelations. Apparently, Heather dislikes her and even has a separate group for the 3 friends, where she mocks the poster.
Ouch! It must be so painful for her, but what hurts more is that although Meghan and Heather didn’t back Hannah, they didn’t defend the poster either. It’s bugging her so much that she feels betrayed and wonders whether to even do Secret Santa with them, like they do every year. Probably devastated and frustrated by it all, she vented online, and folks had a lot to say.
First of all, they told her that she is definitely not being unreasonable to feel betrayed because anyone would if they were in her shoes. They also pointed out that Meghan and Heather are just as mean as Hannah, as they are all ganging up together and making OP feel so bad. People expressed that true friends would never do that if someone they cared about was put in such a situation.
Having solid friends is so important, and it’s not just me or the netizens who are ranting on about it. Even psychology has proved that friends are crucial for living a fulfilling life. It’s no wonder that many of us have friendships into which we pour our heart and soul. Now, imagine that these very friends betrayed you; it would surely feel like the rug had been snatched from under your feet.
Psychologist Kiki Ramsey says, “Being betrayed by a friend violates the trust of someone who was supposed to be a safe space. Friendships grow through shared experiences and confidence, so when that trust is broken, it feels like a personal attack. The emotional fallout can be intense, leaving you questioning the relationship, your judgment, and your worth.”
Well, it’s no surprise that the poster feels absolutely devastated. Many people argued that there’s no point in staying friends with such awful people. Even research suggests that such toxic friendships have detrimental effects on a person’s mental health. I really hope she realizes this and pulls the plug before it’s too late.
If you were in her shoes, what would you do? Drop your thoughts in the comments!
Folks declared that Meghan and Heather are just as mean as Hannah, and it’s not worth it, considering how they mistreated the poster
