Weddings, those magical events where the cake is sweet, but the drama is bitter. Nothing says “I do” quite like a sibling squabble over who gets to stand where and why. As it turns out, siblings and weddings don’t always mix as smoothly as champagne and cake, especially when the plans change.
Just ask our Redditor, as he knows this too well. Our guy thought offering his vacation home as a free venue for his brother’s big day was a cool big bro move, until he found himself booted from the groomsman squad.
More info: Reddit
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One man’s generous offer of a free wedding venue for his brother’s big day seemed like a win-win until he got kicked out of the wedding party
The man, who has a successful career, offered to host his brother’s wedding at his vacation house, with the condition that he would get a spot as a groomsman
Although he agreed to his brother being in the wedding party, the groom later decided the man was no longer a groomsman as they had decided to downsize the wedding
The man took back his offer of hosting the wedding after being downgraded from groomsman to guest, leaving his brother and his fiancée fuming
Our Redditor, Mike, (not his real name but let’s go with it) offered up his vacation property, rent free, for his little brother Tom’s wedding. A beautiful place with a big yard, perfect for those Instagram-worthy wedding shots. The catch? Mike just wanted to be a groomsman. Seems like a good deal, no? He gets the front-row seat, Tom gets a free venue and everyone wins.
Except, a year after their deal, Tom decided to switch up his groomsmen lineup. Suddenly, our guy was out – no tux, no title, nothing.
You can imagine Mike was not happy about being booted from the wedding party. And who could blame him? One minute you’re in and the next you’re benched. Plus, this was the deal he made with his brother in the beginning, and changing it at the last moment didn’t seem fair.
So, our Redditor decided that taking back the venue was a good idea. After all, if he wasn’t important enough to stand beside his brother on his wedding day, why should his vacation home be? Fair’s fair, right? But of course, Tom and his fiancée were furious about losing their free venue and accused Mike of ruining their big day.
But wait, it gets better. As it turns out, the real reason Mike got downgraded from groomsman to guest wasn’t just a matter of downsizing. Nope, it was all because Tom’s fiancée caught wind of Mike’s occasional use of “happiness dust” and labeled him as an addict and unfit groomsman. Tom, instead of having his brother’s back, sided with the bride-to-be, but still wanted to use Mike’s property.
At this point our guy just had to set some boundaries. Just because you’re doing better in life than the rest of your family doesn’t mean you owe them an arm and a leg. But setting boundaries with family is not exactly a walk in the park, especially when it comes to money, and Mike’s line was clear: no groomsman spot, no venue. Simple enough, right? And honestly, can we blame him?
Maybe Tom and his fiancée should have opened the wedding etiquette handbook before booting Mike, because dropping someone from the wedding party after they’ve already been asked is a huge no-no. Once you ask someone to stand by your side, you are making them a promise and changing your mind because of a little sibling spat is just not okay. Feelings get hurt.
So, before you decide to fire your groomsman, or make any big moves, consider your reasons, have a chat with the guy, and make sure the fix isn’t worse than the fallout. After all, weddings should be about celebrating, not creating awkward family reunions. Plus, swapping out your groomsmen is not as easy as changing your playlist.
Weddings cost a fortune, and finding a last-minute venue is no picnic. Especially a free one. Mike’s generous offer could have saved his little brother and his bride thousands, but instead, they chose the hard way. Was taking that kind of financial hit worth it? Probably not, considering they had to scramble to find a new spot. But, if the couple didn’t think our guy was VIP material, why should he roll out the red carpet? Asking for a friend.
What’s your take on this story? Should Mike have just let his bro and his fiancée use his place or was he right to pull the plug on the whole thing after being kicked out from the wedding party? Drop your comments below.
Netizens say the man is not a jerk for going back on his offer of hosting his brother’s wedding at his house
